Archives: [August 2000]
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This is the archive page for the month [August 2000]; below you should see headlines and summaries of all entries found here from that month. Click the appropriate link at each to read the entire entry.

Wedding blues. | August 31, 2000
So I leave right after work today for my brother's wedding in St. Louis. (And of course, the one day all year I have to wear a suit to work is the one day it's supposed to get over 100...

What to say when there's nothing to say. | August 30, 2000
That's the problem when you update your site every day, isn't it? In the 24 hours since writing my last front page, I've gone home, gotten high, made a banner for my friend Carrie's site, converted some Windows fonts into...

"Jason" is a delightfully messy new font. | August 29, 2000
Pretty cool, no? Fontographer has turned out to be a godsend for someone like me, not just for creating new fonts but tweaking old ones. Ask me how many times I've fallen in love with a typeface, just to...

Kubrick-palooza. | August 28, 2000
There's a movie theatre here in Chicago called the Music Box which is roughly a fifteen-minute walk from my apartment. The Music Box is one of the only old-school art film theatres left in Chicago, and perhaps the entire US....

MSG and THC. | August 25, 2000
Got high and had Chinese food last night, and for the thousandth time realized what a perfect compliment the two substances are. I was supposed to go over to Carrie's and work on her website a little more, but between...

Okay, so maybe I'm lousy in bed. | August 24, 2000
An ex-girlfriend of mine contacted me this week and we ended up hanging out at Joyblue last night for the first time in years. Man, it was great to see her. She's the one who's an even bigger geek than...

All signs pointing south. | August 23, 2000
There's a little theory I've developed over the years concerning politics and the popular culture. Before I state it, let me admit that it's purely unscientific and contains a lot of loopholes. As well, there's a lot of people who...

Playing hooky. | August 22, 2000
So, I had a weird experience at work yesterday. Like I mentioned last week, we've been designing this in-house brochure and I've been doing some copywriting for it because there's no one else at the agency who really can. Well,...

Girls throw lousy singles parties. | August 21, 2000
As you might remember, I left work on Friday with two singles parties to attend later that night, which unfortunately is where the title of today's front page comes from. Just what is it with women throwing singles parties, anyway?...

Al Gore made me cry like a little girl. | August 18, 2000
Seriously! Okay, I was stoned while I was watching his acceptance speech last night, which may have something to do with it. But still, what a speech - for the first time this year I actually feel like the Democrats...

Well, it ain't exactly the dog days. | August 17, 2000
64 degrees today, cool enough for a jacket, and pittering down rain all morning. Heat wave? What heat wave? Had a very productive evening at Joyblue last night. Showed up at 10:30, read my "Tao of Nicotine" piece, crowd loved...

She made a lot of sense. | August 16, 2000
I was on kind of a date last night and this is what the woman was saying to me (mind you, she wasn't talking about me) - "I think a lot of guys hit their early thirties and have this...

Cooldown. | August 15, 2000
Back in Chicago, sitting on the el on my way to work, which in a way is a bit of a letdown after ten days on the road but is also kind of comforting. I know people in the poetry...

National Poetry Slam -- Sunday. | August 13, 2000
Scandal! And not just the usual petty "Iâm filing this obscure, hard-to-prove protest because Iâm mad I lost" kind of scandal. Minutes before the finals of this yearâs competition was to start, a charge surfaced accusing the Boston team of...

National Poetry Slam -- Saturday. | August 12, 2000
Providence, Rhode Island is a place of many paradoxes. It is a pristine, beautiful city that nonetheless becomes a ghost town every day at 5 pm. The citizens of Providence are for the most part rich, happy and beautiful, yet...

National Poetry Slam, Friday. | August 11, 2000
Providence! Ah, finally here, after a grueling ten hours yesterday of wrong subways, blocked traffic and missed Amtraks. (Lots to tell about my last night in NYC as well, but itâll have to wait until I get back.) The train...

New York diary -- Wednesday. | August 9, 2000
The Pettus index: Number of books sold: 1 Number of offers of sex: 0 Number of bourbons drank: 12? Number of times stoned: 1 Days in a row awake after 2 a.m.: 4 Number of crazy homeless people yelling at...

New York diary -- Tuesday. | August 8, 2000
So yes, itâs safe to say that everything youâve heard about NYC mayor Rudy Giuliani is true ö that heâs a Nazi, that heâs borderline psychotic. But I canât deny the fact that New York is a much friendlier, happier,...

New York diary -- Monday. | August 7, 2000
The Kinkoâs where Iâm updating my site is at 79th and Lexington, about a twenty minute walk from Catâs apartment. The stroll has turned into a really nice way to start my mornings here in New York. The upper east...

New York diary - Sunday. | August 6, 2000
New York, New York! The town so nice, they named it twice. I've only been here in the city for half a day now, but it's already been a doozy of a time. Things got off to a dubious start...

[book] Chicago Stories 2000 | August 4, 2000
The online table of contents for my book "Chicago Stories 2000," including direct links to HTML versions of all pieces found therein.

Happy anniversary. | August 4, 2000
Today marks the sixth anniversary of the day I moved to Chicago, and like every year I am celebrating it. My friends think it's silly, but the date actually is very important to me. I'll explain. When I was younger...

[story] You fuck like Sleater-Kinney | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "You fuck like Sleater-Kinney," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Way of the drunken warrior | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Way of the drunken warrior," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Untitled (time is a fucked-up concept) | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Untitled (time is a fucked-up concept)," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Untitled (roommate story) | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Untitled (roommate story)," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Tempe | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Tempe," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] A poem for Ellen, who in a moment of weakness asked for one | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "A poem for Ellen, who in a moment of weakness asked for one," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Open letter (Theo) | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Open letter (Theo)," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Open letter (Mike) | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Open letter (Mike)," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Open letter (Katie) | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Open letter (Katie)," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Open letter (Kathy) | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Open letter (Kathy)," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] My name is Jason Pettus and I am not your ex-boyfriend | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "My name is Jason Pettus and I am not your ex-boyfriend," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Manifesto of the obvious | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Manifesto of the obvious," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] The man who masturbated without using his hands | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "The man who masturbated without using his hands," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] The legend of the tower people | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "The legend of the tower people," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] King of the losers | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "King of the losers," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Jason Pettus is one bad motherfucker | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Jason Pettus is one bad motherfucker," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] Jason Pettus is one bad motherfucker | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "Jason Pettus is one bad motherfucker," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] I didn't go to Prom | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "I didn't go to Prom," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

[story] A day without caffeine | August 4, 2000
An online version of my 2000 story "A day without caffeine," also found in the book "Chicago Stories 2000."

Nobody likes me! | August 3, 2000
I'm always tickled when web journalers write about each other. You know what I mean - I read approximately 30 journals each day now, in a half-hour block after work, and the site owners are always dropping references to other...

The sublime beauty of stupid people. | August 2, 2000
Well, I officially had my one millionth run-in with Kinko's yesterday, whose employees as we all know are a bunch of complete and utter idiots. This is an ongoing problem for people like me who do a lot of self-publishing,...

Our delightful neighbors to the north. | August 1, 2000
A friend of mine named Emily is in town this week from Toronto. I first met Emily through the random purchase of one of her chapbooks at Quimby's one day, which I really loved and ended up making me develop...